Feeling Responsible

In the last 2 months, we've been called for four foster placements and only said "yes" to one. We've talked about how fostering and adopting is strange because you feel more in control of your family. You literally go through a list of things you want or don't want in a child, all the way down to age, race and gender. Though it's true we have technically "chosen" who can or cannot come into our home, it is also true that it is God who decides. Just like He gives us our biological children to care for, God has a list of little lives He wants to bless us with through fostering. It is not up to us!!

There are reasons we said "no" to the other placements; timing, illness or just the truth of the overwhelming task it would be. For one possible placement, we didn't get back in touch with the case worker in time and they found another family. Disappointment and confusion are all part of the waiting game with fostering. When the call comes, there is a rush of adrenaline that floods the house. As details are shared and the work load is better understood, the sense of responsibility overcome you. "What will happen if we don't take these sick newborn twins? We are responsible for their lives! How can we say NO?".

The truth is, God loves these children and cares for them whether that's through our family or somewhere else. In order for Dan and I to give what these children need, we have to be prayerful and smart about who or what we take on.

We cannot wait for our next placement and what it will mean for our family. We are ready to jump back in, grow, be stretched and share all that we have with whoever God chooses to give us. But waiting is so so hard! In the meantime, I"m trying to enjoy the quiet before the next storm. Thankfully, our city has lots of ways to keep distracted!

Our library story time ROCKS! Stories, songs and a craft make Monday mornings feel like vacation. (If you're in St. Louis, come join us! Story time at the Kings HWY branch in South City starts at 10:30am Monday mornings!)

Story/craft time at the Missouri History Museum (St. Louis residents, this is a great way to spend a Friday or Saturday morning in the cold winter months! Kid zone is open from 10am-12pm with story time at 10:30am!!)

Gaining serious cool points for driving my kids to an amazing space ship playground!

Then, there's the usual play dates at our house. Watching 4 boys and 1 girl under 5 yrs old. I don't want to get rusty! I've got to keep up on my 'watch multiple kids under a tiny age' skills!

(the little girl and I played doll house all morning!)

Building a "wild dragon fortress" with Elijah.

It's nice to have time with my boys, to sleep through the night and to be able to go out on a moments notice. Still, I'm eager to care for the lost and forgotten, the sick and abandoned. Hopefully this post will be followed by one of a placement announcement!