Kids Say the Darndest Things - Elijah Seuss

Getting ready for bed means very few actions and many many words. Our best conversations happen at bedtime. It's when Elijah decides to work on his monologues about tooth paste and bearded ladies, dog treats and pumpkin bread. Everything that is random starts coming out of his rose colored pencil lips and it. is. amazing.

Every night, Elijah spends a few minutes going on a doggie hunt. He searches the house for his two doggies and pretends he can't find them until mommy or daddy get frustrated.

Elijah : "um, mama, i just took a reallllly long time finding my doggies, hehe. i found the little one but not my big doggie. then, i looked and looked and he was in the living room, not on the little table. on the taaaaaaall table. not the brown one. the black one. the black brown tall table not in the living room. (grin)"

Thanks Elijah Seuss.

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We have found doggies, brushed teeth, gone potty, read books and got dressed in pajamas. I've prayed and sang two hymns without missing a verse (hymns are soooo long!). We finally get to the laying in bed part, and this is what comes out:

elijah: "uh, mom, um, um, um what are the fish like when the bears eat them?"


me: "hmm, what do you mean?"

elijah: "um, i mean, wait, i'm trying to tell you something. um, so, when the bears eat the fish, what do they feeeeeel like?"

me : "well honey, they probably hurt. it probably doesn't feel very good to the fish when they are being eaten by bears."

elijah : "oh. (sigh) well, that makes me sad."

me: "i know. it's hard. and pretty sad, too."


elijah : "well, um, but if a big big man scares a bear and makes it mad, then the bear might eat the man! and then, the fish don't have to hurt anymore." (now happy again)

me : "yeah, i guess that works out, doesn't it?"

 I guess he didn't realize that the man would then be suffering from a bear attack!