Wednesday, October 26, 2011

Never Wake a Sleeping Mama

We've all heard the phrase "Never wake a sleeping baby". There's actually quite a list of other sleepers you should never wake including bears, giants, and dragons. Basically anything that would be angry about being woken up while also being big enough to eat you as a result of their anger. Today, I would officially like to include "mamas" to that list.

Sunday afternoon, Dan and I passed out during afternoon nap time. It was not a choice. Our bodies literally shut down after a long emotionally draining week. I don't know how long we slept but when I woke up, the bed was empty and I had a pile of pillows on my body.

Apparently Dan and the boys thought it would be funny to pile pillows on top of me and then take pictures. Lucky for them, their silly act didn't wake me up. Otherwise, I surely would have eaten them, beginning with the smallest offender.

Note to husbands, significant others, children: If you see a sleeping mama anywhere, ever, DO NOT WAKE HER! This sort of deep, death like sleep only comes once a year. If she didn't wake up to the usual sounds of mouth breathing and baby giggles, it's obvious she's lost in dream land where the time and rate at which she pees is optional and uninterrupted. Leave her be and let all other commitments and needs fall to the side. She will be back to her normal skittish, wake up at the sound of a bird farting two miles away self in no time.

Unless the house is truly on fire (or there's a sale on socks at Target), leave her alone. You'll all be happier for it :)

{this post was in no way written to offend my dear husband who, I later found out, was the one who piled the pillows and snapped the pics. no children or husbands were eaten on the day of this event.}

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